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Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Wiener Dog Song

PETS ON QUILTS 2014!!!!!



























It's that time of year again!  PETS ON QUILTS 2014 is here and we are again entering!  Prizes galore and we had two Blogville winners last year!  Who is going to win this year?  Go to Lily Pad Quilting to see what Padsworth and Dragon Drop have in store for us this year!  Starts August 1st!!!!!

Saturday, July 26, 2014

The Treasure of Squeaky Toy Island, Chapter 8!

The Treasure of Squeaky Toy Island
Chapter 8
Walter looked down at the longship, and said, “Where do you think you're going?”

“We need to get back to port”, Ernie said. “Can you raise the bridge?”

“Port?”, Easy said. “I thought we were going to plunder-”

Ernie slapped a paw over Easy's snoot, and Walter said, “What did he just say?”

“Never mind”, Ernie said. “He's getting daft from lack of food and water. Can you raise the bridge?”

Walter looked at the signal, and said, “Not til the last train clears the circuit just east of here.”

“How long will that be?”

“Hard to say. He was doing about 15, so give it another three minutes.”

“Great. Just great!”


As soon as the last line was taught, Captain Snoopy and his crew dragged the heavy chest up on deck, and stood by as the last few inebriated souls made their way past the docks. When the coast was clear, Captain Snoopy led them down the gangplank to the wooden pier.
The gaslights still illuminated the street, but not a furry soul was in sight. The air was cooler now, and a fog was settling over the cove. Captain Snoopy crouched down and sniffed the wooden planking. He then pointed with his paw, and headed down the cobblestones, keeping his snoot low to maintain their path in the rapidly declining visibility.

They made their way past dark houses, offices, and warehouses, until the terrain finally gave way to sand and palm trees. The moonlight barely penetrated the fog, giving them perfect cover.

The road soon turned to sand, and dragging the heavy chest grew ever more difficult. When the were up to their knees in beach, Captain Snoopy said, “This is the spot, Matey's. Start digging.”

Frankie and Muffin set the chest down, and immediately dug their paws into the ground. It didn't take long before the kicked up sand gave them more cover than the fog.

The fog horn started sounding again, and they started singing, “Fifteen furs on a dead dach's chest, yo, ho, ho and a bag full of treats!”

It took about an hour to dig up enough sand to bury the chest. Carefully, they lowered the box into the hole, and kicked the sand over it with their hind paws. As soon as the last of the sand cleared, they found themselves in the grip of a dense fog that their lanterns couldn't penetrate.
Snoopy looked around, and said, “Oh my dog! If it rains again, the scent will wash away, and we'll never find our way back.”

Muffin removed her red bandanna, and said, “Here, Cap'n. Tie this to the tree, and we'll be able to find it when the sun comes up.”

“Good thinking.”

Captain Snoopy quickly tied the scarf around the tall palm tree, and said, “All right, Mateys, bear a paw. I'll buy ye all a drink of blue platinum at the Pug Ranch Tavern.”

Howls of joy reverberated through the fog. If they only knew.


Back on the longship, Ernie and Easy were standing by. Their hopes rose when the air horn gave one prolonged blast, then one short. The span lock motors rotated into full release, and then the bridge began its ascent. As soon as the span light changed from red to green, Easy grabbed the sweep oar. But Walter was waving his lantern horizontally.

They wondered why, until they heard the roar of a speedboat. It drifted through the open span, then throttled up, and sped away. Walter now moved his lantern vertically, and Ernie said, “Into the main ship channel.”

“You got it, Skipper”, Easy said. “What was that boat that just went out ahead of us?”

“That be the relief boat for Blue Platinum Island. There's a half-hour til midnight, when the watch changes.”

From the left hand seat in the speedboat, Penny looked aft, and said, “Did you see what ship that was?”

At the helm, Ruby said, “As long as it wasn't the Rawhide, I'm not worried. The last thing we need is for that husband of ours to catch us moonlighting as furmaids.”

“Captain Speedy said the Rawhide is already in. So if I know Frankie, he's probably home in bed by now.”

“That's if Captain Snoopy's released him yet. Who had the second watch tonight?”

“Tasha and Puddles.”

“Hope we didn't forget the Cheetos.”

“Or the beer.”

Penny looked back, and said, “We have plenty.”

“Yeah, but there's another problem. Look.”

Penny turned and said, “Fog.”

“I didn't mean that. Look up.”

Above their heads, a green flare exploded, lighting up the sky. Then, the water beneath them began to stir. They huddled close together, as the swirling grew into churning.



Wednesday, July 23, 2014

The Treasure of Squeaky Toy Island, Chapter 7

The Treasure of Squeaky Toy Island
Chapter 7
The blue-uniformed German Shepard tore off the paper from his book, and said, “You're being cited for excessive speed in a no wake zone.”

Reluctantly, Ernie the Red accepted the Summons. 
Easy said, “But Sarge, we weren't speeding. Like I told you, we were being towed in, and the boat towing us was going too fast.”

“That's right”, Ernie said.” If we hadn't cut that line, we would have hit the railroad bridge for sure.”

“Is that so?”, Sarge said. “Well, in that case, give me back that ticket.”

With a grin Ernie handed it back, but his heart sank when Sarge checked off another box, and said, “Failure to display proper lighting for vessel under tow. Oh, and since it was foggy tonight, failure to sound proper fog signal for vessel under tow. I think that finishes it up. Here you go.”

Ernie took back the summons, and said, “Thanks a lot.”

“You're very welcome. All right, guys, try to stay out of trouble.”

Without a breath, they watched Sarge hop back over onto the Coast Guard Cutter, and when he started up the motor, they kept their eyes on him until the boat sailed away.

 Ernie looked at the ticket, then at Easy, and said, “Nice going. You try to argue us out of a ticket, and what happens, you get us two more tickets.”

“Hey, Skipper, it could be worse. He might have spotted the contraband.”

“Want to say that a little louder? I don't think he heard you.”

In a louder voice, Easy repeated, “Hey, Skipper, it could be worse. He could have-”

Ernie slapped his paw over Easy's snoot, and said, “Are ye daft? You want him to clap us in irons? Besides, we have a bigger problem.”

“Like what?”

Ernie pointed to the lowered drawbridge, and said, “Like that. Until they raise the bridge, we're stranded, and the Rawhide will be in port.”

“We could swim for it, Skipper.”

“Aye, we can swim for it. And what happens when we find the booty? Some of the booty's made of fur. Fur soaks up water!”

“Oh yeah.”

“If they would just raise that bridge...............”



Walter looked up the tracks, and said, “So the train's stuck?”

“According to dispatch, all the eastbounds are backed up by a tree that fell across the tracks about an hour ago”, Millie said. “Signals, track, and mechanical are all out there trying to get traffic moving again.”

“Why don't you raise the bridge?”

“I can't. It indication locked when I set the eastbound signal.”

“Cancel the signal.”

“I did. It's still running time.”

“How much longer?”

“Fifteen seconds.”

Suddenly, they heard an air horn. Millie looked up at the model board, and said, “Track circuit just went down westbound.”

“Must be the wreck train. Line the westbound signal on one.”

Millie pushed the button, and said, “Running time.............................Clear signal indication lock on track one.”

The horn sounded again, and a headlight appeared on the horizon. Walter turned and said, “Here comes the wreck train.”


From the longship, Ernie and Easy watched the big diesel switcher rumble across the bridge, trailing behind it an assortment of gondolas, flatcars, a boom tender car, and at the very end, a large six-axle wreck crane. As the crane made its way over the bridge, suddenly everything went dark.

Ernie smiled. Easy said, “What happened, Skipper?”

“Power's out. They'll have to crank the bridge back up. And with the lights out, we can slip under the bridge, unseen. As soon as we get our night vision, head for that bridge.”

“Sure thing, Skipper. Hey, look, somebody's walking down the tracks with a lantern.”

“He's probably going to crank the bridge up right now. Head for the channel.”

Easy grabbed the sweep oar, and said, “You got it, skipper.”

Slowly and quietly, they sailed towards the bridge, being careful not to approach too quickly, lest they reach it before Walter got it cranked to the upright position.

After a few minutes, the lantern light seemed to disappear, and they couldn't see the bridge. And then they heard a loud whine.

Startled, Easy said, “What was that, Skipper?”

“Sounds like a diesel engine starting up.”

“Like on another train?”

Ernie listened to the sound, and said, “Could be. Sounds like it's idling.”

“So we'll have to wait for another train?”

“I don't know where it could have come from. There weren't any other trains around. That means...................”


All at once, the entire area lit up. And Walter was looking right at them. With a scowl, Easy said, “Any more bright ideas, Skipper?”

Monday, July 21, 2014

Pet Product Review! Coccolino Creations!

Hello Blogville!  Snickers and Sable here!  What, you don't know who we are?  Well, then allow us the opportunity to introduce ourselves to you!  

Snickers is a gorgeous black and tan short fur who is 12 years old and Sable is the gorgeous 8 year old red smooth beauty who came into rescue only last week.  We are a bonded pair of ladies who were abandoned by our family when they moved, leaving us behind.  We were discovered, covered in fleas and taken to a kill shelter in Illinois and we were there over two weeks before DRNA found us and sprang us! What a terrible experience that shelter was! Tuesday, WHN picked us up and we have been on a different kind of ride since then!  Snickers had worms and her skin was in terrible shape- on top of that she needs to put on a lot of weight.  She also has trouble walking due to her right rear leg being weak and unable to bear much weight, so she walks like a very drunk sailor, or like Puddles after a night of partying!  Sable is a snausagey 19 lbs of love, and is on a diet! She did not have worms, but was treated for them.  Both had their initial rescue vetting and dentals last week, and a third trip to the vet for xrays to see if Snickers suffered from back issues and thankfully she does not!  Both are well versed in the big brown eyes routine and closely snoopervise all kitchen activities in the house- helping WHN prepare meals and then doing the dishes!  Both are on antibiotics to help clear up their skin issues and will be having medicated baths three times a week- 

We have been sleeping in the big bed every single night and we love it!  We get along with our new pack- Sable and Anna are pawticularly getting friendlier each day. Snickers shares sling time duties with Snoopy, so WHN is staying out of trouble for once. We love going in the car and love going to McDonald's for chicken nuggets!  (we are getting a little spoiled but Mr. Geoff says that we are worth it!)  We spend lots of time on the couch watching tv and just love being pet. 

Tasha and Sable

Snickers and Sable

Snoopy and Snickers



Now imagine our surprise when the mailman brought us a big box today!  We have only been here a week and we are already getting mail!  Coccolino, a brand new friend, keeps his mom out of trouble by helping her run her very own Etsy Shop called Coccolino Creations.  She makes fabulous pet beds, and WHN bought one for us to try out!  It arrived today and Snickers claimed it for her very own.  Miss Katie even sent a mini pig head squeaky and Snickers just went crazy- this is the first toy in which she has shown any interest.  We had some issues when Tasha heard the squeak, but she backed down quickly.   (Tasha believes that every singl stuffie and squeaky is hers)  Now Snickers has her own pied a terre to enjoy, whiling away the day, dreaming of milk bones and kibbly bits, while her daddy is at work!

So, if you need a fabulous pet bed, just head right over to Coccolino Creations and find the pawfect bed for you!  Snickers gives Miss Katie four paws and a tail up!




s

Monday Mirth!


Wednesday, July 16, 2014

The Treasure of Squeaky Toy Island- Chapter 6

The Treasure of Squeaky Toy Island
Chapter 6

Squeaky Toy Light loomed up over the horizon. Within minutes, they could see the great bivalve lens spin above their heads. But there was no time for sightseeing. Their actual objective was just south of the great lighthouse. 

A pair of red lights caught their eyes. Speedy looked between them, and then upward until he saw a green light. Checking his paw watch, he said, “If we get in within the next fifteen minutes, we'll be safe.”

Captain Snoopy turned to Bowsun Frankie, and said, “Have ye got the thingy that makes the noise?”

Frankie held up his wooden whistle, and said, “Aye, Cap'n.”

“When I hold up me paw, give the first blow. But softly.”

“Aye, Cap'n.”

“We're on final approach to the main ship channel”, Speedy said.

“Put the helm midships and lash her down.”

“Aye, Cap'n. Bear a paw, laddies and lassies!”
Speedy looked forward, and said, “Half astern!”

“Half astern!”, Coccolino replied.

The engines wound down, and the wake died away.

Easy noticed the sudden quiet, and said, “What's going on, Skipper?”

Ernie pointed towards the shore, and said, “He's trying to slow them down for the channel. He just cut his engine, and he's gonna reverse it to bring her to a stop.”

Ernie was right. Within seconds, the water started churning in the opposite direction. Ernie kept an eye on the big ship, and said, “Watch that heavin' line. We don't want too much slack.”

“Sure thing Skipper.”

Speedy watched the shoreline approaching, and said, “Dead Slow Ahead!”

“Dead Slow Ahead”, Coccolino answered.

The wake disappeared once again, and this time there was very little churning as they moved forward. By now, the dark form of an open railroad bascule bridge loomed up in front of them. Captain Snoopy smiled, and held up his paw.

Frankie inhaled, and softly blew one long blast with the wooden whistle. He then blew a second long blast, a short one, and another long.
He panted a few times, and said, “How was that, Cap'n.?”

“Fine, lad, just fine. When we're closer, I want you to give a louder sound, with the very same signal.”

“Aye, Cap'n.”

Speedy leaned over the bulwark, and said, “Give me one prolonged blast of the whistle.”
The blast of a steam horn filled the air. Speedy leaned over again, and said, “Now a short blast.”

Coccolino obliged. A second later, the same signal was blasted out on a loud air horn. 

Captain Snoopy smiled, and said, “This is it, lads and lassies!”

Speedy looked up at the bridge, and said, “Get that helm amidships, and meet her as we pass through the channel.”

“Aye, sir”, Coccolino replied.

“And keep her on dead slow ahead!”

“Yes, sir.”

On the platform of the bridge operators cabin, with fur nearly as red as the lights on the bridge fenders, Walter was keeping an eye on the vessels approaching. He didn't notice Frankie put the wooden whistle back in his mouth. But he was sure he had just heard the whistle of a distant train.

Not daring to leave his post while a ship was passing beneath the bridge, he called through the open door, “Millie, do you see any trains coming?”

Millie flipped the light switch on the model board, and said, “No circuits are down.”

“I thought I heard a train whistle for the crossing.”

“If there was a train at the last crossing, we'd hear it for sure. It must be too far away yet.”
Millie then shut off the lights, and came out to join Walter. Walter momentarily gazed up the tracks to where he thought the sound had come from. He didn't see anything, but he was sure he had heard something, not once, but twice. And the second time was definitely louder than the first.

Noticing Walter's concern, Millie said, “The board was clear.”

“Right, but it was rainy tonight. Those rails could be covered with sand, and we could lose the shunt. As soon as this ship clears, we need to drop the bridge.”

Millie nodded, then waved to Coccolino as the prow passed under the bridge. At that moment, Captain Snoopy said, “Stand by, and when I give the signal, give it all you got.”

Speedy had moved forward by this time, and as they passed the operator's cabin, he leaned down and said, “As soon as their stern clears the bridge fender, head her straight into the main ship channel, and bring her up to slow ahead.”

“Aye, sir.”

Walter and Millie watched and waved as the stern passed the platform, and Frankie took a deep breath. As soon as their stern was clear, he blew the whistle as hard as he could.”

“Oh my dog!”, Millie shouted. You were right! “

Ernie and Easy were standing on the bow of their longship, fighting back drool. Their weapons were laid out on deck, and their sacks were ready to be filled with squeaky plunder. Or so they thought.

Easy watched the Rawhide pass into the main ship channel, and he felt the towline pull taught. Still drooling, he said, “Looks like smooth sailing now, Skipper.”

“Aye. Little do they know.................”

Suddenly, five short blast of an air horn ripped through the solace of the night. Nervously, Easy said, “What's going on, skipper?”

Before Ernie could answer, a huge sign near the bridge lit up “Caution! Caution! Caution!”
The horn sounded again, and again Easy said, “What's happening?”

This time, their worst fears were confirmed. The message on the sign changed to: “Caution! Bridge coming down!”

But that wasn't the worst of it. On the other side of the bridge, Speedy had just put the steam launch on Half Ahead. Ernie looked at the bridge, watched the towline stretch out, and yelled, “Get the hatchet! Now!”

But the worst was yet to come. Suddenly, a bright light shone on them, and a voice shouted, “This is the Coast Guard! Wienerking longship throttle down and stand by to be boarded!”

Ernie grabbed a battle axe, and struck a hard blow. The towline snapped like a rubber band, flying away into the darkness. Ernie and Easy were knocked to the deck.


It was then that they heard a motor speeding up. It was followed immediately by the blare of a siren.

Tuesday, July 15, 2014

We Are Blogville!


We, the Dachsies with Moxie, are joining our pals Murphy and Stanley, in this first ever We Are Blogville blog hop!!!

We the DWM currently are comprised of Tasha, a ten year old black and tan beauty who adopted WHN and Mr Geoff while she was forced to be a foster from DRNA.  Next up we have Snoopy, a six year old red and white piebald also a former foster from DRNA who keeps WHN under control.   IN third place we have Anna, a nine year old black and tan snausagey female who rules her daddy like her predecessor Anna Rose- she too is a former DRNA foster who quickly saw what suckers Mr. Geoff and WHN are. We live in Florissant, Missouri, just north of St Louis.

AND... as of Today we also include Snickers, a 12 year old black and tan female who is quite thin and has several health problems, and her buddy, Sable, an 8 year old red smooth who also has health issues but needs to lose a lot of weight.  WHN picked them up this morning - and we only know that their "family" moved and left them behind and they subsequently ended up at a kill shelter in Illinois.  They were covered in fleas and Snickers had worms.  They will be at the vet thoday, and have their shots and initial veting, then their dentals will be scheduled for later this week.  Snickers has a very weak rght rear leg and Sable has a very large mass on the center of her chest so please keep these ladies in your prayers.  When Mr. Geoff learned of their circumstances, theHBO, Showtime and Cinemax words flew for about an hour, he was so angry at what was done to these ladies!
 .

Friday, July 11, 2014

The Treasure of Squeaky Toy Island, Chapter 5

The Treasure of Squeaky Toy Island
Chapter 5

There on deck, beside the previous day's plunder, was the ship's longbow. Beside it was a long, coiled heaving line. Ernie looked up, and said, “Bowman Easy!”

With his blue fur barley visible in the gloom, Easy crept up on deck, and said, “You called, Skipper?”

“Of course I'm called 'Skipper', I'm the Captain! See that heaving line?”

“Aye, sir.”

“Secure it to that arrow, and aim the longbow for the stern of the rawhide!”

“Aye, sir!”

By now, Captain Snoopy had been untied from the mainmast, and was keeping a steady hand on the wheel. Beside him, Captain Speedy was keeping an eye on his launch, and the towline. Just over the horizon, they could make out the faint loom of a light.

Captain Speedy pointed with his paw, and Captain Snoopy nodded, and said, “Aye, she be Squeaky Toy Light.” In a few more seconds, the faint sound of the diaphone fog horn confirmed it.

“Port your helm one point”, Speedy said.

“Port helm one point, aye”, answered Captain Snoopy. “What be that noise?”

“Sounds like a whistle.............”

Then came a dull thud. They looked aft, but saw nothing. With a shrug, they turned and looked back at the sea. The loom of the light grew ever stronger, and the diaphone ever louder.

Captain Snoopy scanned the sea, and said, “Smooth sailing from here on out!”

About a cable's length aft, Easy gave a tug on the line, and said, “We've hooked 'em, Skipper. Shall I pull us in!”

“Avast there, Matey! If we pull in now, they'll know we're coming and they'll be ready. Stand fast and enjoy the ride.”

“Aye aye, sir. This is just like water skiing.”

The lantern gallery of Squeaky Toy Light loomed up over the horizon. Speedy checked his paw watch, and said, “It's been more than a minute since we last heard the fog horn. Must be clearing.”

“Have your crew put the engines half ahead!”

“Aye, Captain!”

 He leaned over the bulwark, and yelled, “Engines ahead half!”

From the pilothouse, Coccolino yelled back, “Half ahead, aye!”

They heard the engines start to throb, and the water began to churn. Speedy watched the towline grow taut, ans said, “Port your helm, two points!”

“Port helm, two points, aye.”

Ernie and Easy felt the longship suddenly lurch forward. Ernie peered through the darkness, and said, “Oh my dog! Right fifteen degrees, now!”

Easy Grabbed the sweep oar, gave it a good push, and said, “I got her, Skipper. What's going on?”

“Now that the fog's lifting, he probably wants to bring them in faster. Keep an eye on that sweep oar! If we don't meet her with each swing, they'll swamp us!”

Easy held tightly on the sweep oar, and said, “I got her, Skipper.”

Back aboard the Rawhide, Frankie was walking the decks, when he thought he saw something dangling from the stern. He stuck his head over the bulwark, confirmed his suspicions, and ran back to the helm.

He drew in close to Captain Snoopy, and whispered his findings. Captain Snoopy grinned, and said, “Get below and get that wooden thingy that makes the noise.”

“Aye, Cap'n.”

“What's up?” asked Speedy.

Snoopy whispered his plan. Speedy smiled, and said, “You can count on me, Captain.”

Ernie was still in control of his craft, but it was taking all of Easy's strength to keep them on a safe course. He looked down at Ernie, and said, “How much longer, Skipper?”

“Not long. Look!”


Easy turned his head forward, and he saw it too. They watched and waited. Little did they know what Snoopy had in mind.

Tuesday, July 8, 2014

The Treasure of Squeaky Toy Island, Chapter 4

The Treasure of Squeaky Toy Island
Chapter 4

“A hurricane?” Frankie asked.

“No”, Muffin said.

“Thunder?”

“No. Sounds like a fog horn.”

“Not Squeaky Toy Light?”

“Wrong sound. Four short blasts.”

“Where away?”

“Two points off starboard beam, and closing.”
Frankie looked down to the rolling deck far below, and said, “Pilot launch approachin' Cap'n.”

“Where away?”

The fog horn sounded again, and Frankie said, “Two points off starboard bow, range half mile and closing.”

Captain Snoopy looked towards the prow, and said, “On the forecastle, ready up a heavin' line, and stand by to starboard.” He then looked up and said, “Start haulin' in the mainsails.”

A set of lights emerged from the gloom. Above the red and green running lights, Captain Snoopy could see a red light, and directly above it a white light. “All paws, get a ladder rigged, but don't set it down before the pilot boat's alongside, or Ernie the Red will board us for sure!”

The steam launch slackened speed. By now, they could see a large white rabbit standing on the forecastle. Frankie looked down from the rigging, and said, “Cap'n! It's Speedy!”

“That's Captain Speedy to you, Matey!”, shouted the rabbit. “Drop that ladder, or yer on ye own!”

“You heard him, lads”, Captain Snoopy shouted. “Lower away!”

As the ladder came down, Captain Speedy turned to Coccolino at the helm, and said, “Where's me bloody gaff! I can't get a grip on that ladder without it!”

“On the way, skipper!”

Within seconds, a trio of crabby girls slithered out onto the deck of the launch, holding the boat hook in their delicate but strong claws. 
Captain Speedy frowned, grabbed the boathook, and said, “Took ye lassies long enough! Ship ahoy!”

Frankie descended from the mast, popped his snoot over the bulwark, and said, “We''ll send down the heavin' line for'd, and ye can tie off the hawser.”

Captain Speedy caught the ladder with his boathook, reached out with one paw, grabbed hold and stepped off the deck. The crabby girls took back his boathook, and headed forward to grab the towline. Coccolino throttled up the launch, just as Speedy climbed up onto the Rawhide. When his paws were on deck, he looked around, and said, “Where be ye Captain?”

Frankie pointed up to the mainmast, and said, “It's his only defense against the furmaids.”

“That being the case, you'll need that hawser.”

Frankie climbed up to the bow, fed the heaving line through the bow chock, and threw it down to the steam launch. The crabby girls worked together to secure it to the eye of the towline. Once it was taught, Frankie called out, “All paws on deck!”

By now, Blue Platinum Island was behind the Rawhide, but Ernie the Red was approaching the rocky shore. Not only was he fighting his urge to head for the beautiful music, he also had to contend with his plunder being taken in tow. No matter how fast his crew rowed, they'd never be able to outrun the steam launch.

The Rawhide had just enough distance on Ernie and his longship to rule out the possibility of boarding, or fouling the towline. He heard the launch's whistle, and he knew the Rawhide had been taken in tow. 

Suddenly, he had an idea.



Thursday, July 3, 2014

The Treasure of Squeaky Toy Island- Chapter 3

The Treasure of Squeaky Toy Island
Chapter 3

All gathered around Captain Snoopy. Being careful to make sure Ernie the Red wasn't listening, Captain Snoopy whispered, “Lash me to the mainmast.”

Shocked, Bowsun Frankie said, “Cap'n, 'tis foolhardy!”

“Lash me to the mainmast, or ye tail will be mizzen!”

Reluctantly, they lashed their Captain to the mainmast, just as Blue Platinum Island came into view. Through the storm, they heard a furry maiden call out, “Ship Ahoy!”

From the mainmast Captain Snoopy yelled, “Furmaids! Keep on course, Bowson Frankie.”

“Shall we answer their hail, Cap'n?”

“Are ye daft? It'll mean certain drunkenness! And they'll take our squeaky toys faster than Ernie the Red. Especially the one they be callin' Tasha! She's Queen of the unstuffed stuffed Squeaky toys!”

“I've heard of her. She unstuffs squeaky toys faster 'an Puddles can eat a bag o' Cheetos.”
“How shall we evade them, Cap'n?”

“Squeaky toys are me downfall! If ye keep me away from the helm until we've passed, I'll not fall into their trap.”

Just then, they heard the strains of a song coming in off the wind. A terrible rendition it was, but it summed up the wishes of all.
Tasha covered her ears, and said, “What's that awful racket?”

“'Everybody wants to Rule the World'. You know, Tears for Beers.”

Fears. Besides, that's not a furmaid song. Like this: Soft Snoopy, warm Snoopy, little ball of fur, happy Snoopy, sleepy Snoopy, grr, grr, grr.” 

Tasha then took a squeaky toy, put it in her mouth, and said, “Now, you sing, and I'll squeak.”

As the ships drew nearer to the rocky crag, Captain Snoopy's crew began to decipher the words, and they all stared at him. With a scowl, he said, “The first swab who laughs is getting' keelhauled!”

Frankie climbed up the ratlines to get a better view. Muffin loooked down from the crow's nest, and said, “What gives?”

“Cap'n Snoopy's downfall is squeaky toys. Tasha knows that, and she's trying to lure him to shore. The Cap'n is trying to use the sound of the squeaky toys to throw Ernie the Red off our scent.”

“That won't be easy. He's a scent hound.”
“Aren't we all?”

By now, Blue Platinum Island was close abeam on the starboard side. Captain Snoopy thrashed about on the mainmast, trying to break free and follow the beautiful music. But his loyal crew were excellent at marlinspike seamanship, and the ropes held.

As they passed by, Frankie watched from up in the rigging, keeping his eye on the tiny island. In the gloom he could just barely see the piles of Cheeto sacks, beer 6-packs, and squeaky toys, but he could sure hear the music.
He then looked aft, and saw Ernie's longship gaining. Ernie was still posted near the bow, but from up in the rigging it was impossible to tell if he was listening to the music or not.
Muffin looked down, and said, “Does Ernie like squeaky toys?”

“I sure hope so.”

Suddenly, they thought they saw a light sweeping the sea off the starboard quarter. 

“Is that Squeaky Toy Island light?”, Muffin asked.

“Nay. Wrong direction. When we do see Squeaky Toy Island Light, she'll be dead ahead.”

“I hear something.”

“Where?”, Frankie asked.

“Off the Starboard Quarter.”

Frankie turned his ear towards the stern, and said, “I hear it, too.”

“What is it?”


“Sounds like...................”

Wednesday, July 2, 2014

The Treasure of Squeaky Toy Island, Chapter 2!!!!

The Treasure of Squeaky Toy Island
Chapter 2

“A squeaky toy?”, Tasha asked.

“No”, Puddles said. “Looks like a bone.........no wait, two bones........and they're milk bones, and there's a dachsie skull on top of them.”

“Floating in the water?”

“Flying on the mast.”

“The Jolly Rrrrrrroger?”

“And we know what that means.”

They looked at each other, and said, “Captain Snoopy!”

Suddenly, pretty far off, came what sounded like a yip. Puddles looked out to sea, and could faintly make out what looked like another ship. And on the prow was what looked like an open-mouthed dachshund, teeth bare, tongue ready to lick to death all who got in its way.

As the ship drew closer, they could make out the silhouette of a furry dachshund, holding a round shield and sporting a pointy brass helmet adorned with some pretty big horns. As the moon poked out through the storm clouds, they could see his fur was a deep shade of red.

Tasha and Puddles looked at each other, and said, “Captain Snoopy's in trouble.”

Puddles then looked at her beer cooler, and said, “So am I. I knew I should have made deer smorgasbord!”

Trouble was putting it mildly. Aboard the Rawhide, Captain Snoopy had mustered all paws on the quarterdeck, and had doused all lights. In the gloom, he could hear the barks and howls, and fearing that Ernie the Red would follow the sound, he whispered, “Avast there mateys. He'll not find us in the dark.”

Suddenly, the Weinerking longship was bathed in orange torch glow from stem to stern. Not only could Ernie see them, they could see him.

Frankie turned to Captain Snoopy and said, “Any more bright ideas?”

“I could be wrong, you know”, Captain Snoopy answered.

From the longship, they could hear a voice bellow, “Heave to and hand over the squeky toys, or we'll board ye!”

Frankie turned to Captain Snoopy, and said, “Think he means it?”

“Nay! Hey, Ernie the Red, you can't be boardin' us!”

“Why not? The water's not so deep, and we can all swim!”

Frankie started to shake. “He's right, Cap'n.”
“Sure 'tis a bluff. If they jump in the water, their torches will go out.”

Just then, a torch came flying through the air, and landed on deck. As the crew struggled to douse the flames, Captain Snoopy yelled, “If ye burn us down, your plunder will go down with the ship, and be lost forever to Davy Bones!”

“Nay, Captain”, Ernie said. “Squeaky toys float.”

“He has a point, Cap'n”, Frankie said.

“Pipe down, or I'll clap ye in irons.”

From the Crows' Nest, navigator Muffin called out, “Land Ho!”

Everyone looked. Bowsun Frankie scowled. “Blue Platinum Rock! We've got the Wienerkings out for plunder, and the furmaids trying to lure us to certain satiation and drunkenness on the shoal. We're finished! And we'll have a terrible hangover in the morning.”

“I said Pipe down”, Captain Snoopy said. “I've got me an idea. Mateys, lend me ye floppy ears.”